What is up with that weirdo?
by Galvantula866
Summary: Shiro and Rin try to understand each other, but is that a order too tall to fulfill? Set after the end of the 5th Holy Grail Wars.
1. Shiro's side

**Disclaimer: Fate/ Stay Night is the shared property of both Type Moon and Nitro Plus.**

Ah, Rin Tohsaka...

From just one first glance at her one might think she is an example of the perfect woman: prim, proper and polite. But the truth of the matter is that Rin is this way to a fault.

Above all else she's harsh, mean spirited, competitive, and just **plain **nasty towards me. She believes I have no real power as a Magus, though to be fair my father didn't really have time to teach me much apart from the basics. I have no idea why she's this way with me, other than the fact she thinks my hopes of saving everyone are futile at best.

She was nice enough to help me out with the Holy Grail War and with general house work, but she always has this bad attitude with me no matter what I did. Even if I do things correctly she'll fly off the handle and snap my head off and when I goof up then all Hell breaks loose. Nobody at school really sees this side of her other than me and I oftentimes wonder if she hates me for what I am or what I try to be.

There's some half baked theory that she just may like me as more than a friend, but I have yet to see that idea have any grounding to it. Rin is difficult to be around with as her temper is not something you want to be on the receiving end of and yet I have been yelled at so much that I'm beginning to think she's unstable.

In her defense I never hear about her father or her sister that I overheard her talk about in her sleep. Could it be that she's had such a horrible childhood that she feels the need to project her anger out at the world to cope with her awful family life? I don't know for certain and I don't dare ask her for risk of setting her off on a violent rampage.

Losing Archer was a huge blow to her and I fear that she's repressing a lot of negative emotions from that traumatic event. We were never close, but Archer always seemed so upset with me for reasons only he knew. Now that he's gone we'll never know what it was about me that caused him to dislike me so much.

I've heard of the "Tsundere" type from anime boards online and the idea of someone being mean and spiteful towards someone they love is an alien concept to me. If I really have to label Rin I'd say that she's mentally unwell and should seek aid for her anger issues.

What is Rin really? I guess I may never fully understand her and that's probably the way she likes it. Distant and aloof. I can't help but pity her now that the Holy Grail War is done with and she has no real path in life. Maybe she'll see this letter I am writing now and think about her life.

She's not a evil person. She just needs help.


	2. Rin's side

**Fate Stay is the property of Type MOON and Nitro Plus.**

You'd think I'd be sick of Shiro acting the way he does...well, pretty much all the time. For the most part you're right about that.

It's not that I hate Shiro; it's just most of what he does and more importantly the way he is. He's a sexist pig who rushes into battle with such bullheaded disregard for his own safety that even I'm amazed he's lived for as long as he has. I blame Kiritsugu Emiya for implanting Avalon into his soul to save his life as well as giving his ideals that are not only unrealistic, he didn't even follow them anymore. Plus his attempts to teach him sorcery were ultimately met with lackluster results.

I do feel bad about criticizing what little he was able to teach Shiro with what little time he had left before the Grail's curse took him away from this mortal coil, but to think that his dreams were only withheld by a sexist buffoon! It's insulting to both women AND any self-respecting Magus!

I had to re-teach him the most basic fundamentals of magic, how the Grail War worked, even how a Master should use their Servant! If it weren't for his cooking skills and kind demeanor I'd had toss him to Berserker long ago. Life just seemed to always go in favor of the idiots of the world and Shiro is no exclusion to that unspoken rule. It's true that fortune favors the foolish after all. Such a pity; most people throw away their very lives to gain the talent they believe will allow them to go forward but in the end it all boils down to dumb luck.

Further frustrating matters is the issues with my sister Sakura. She has incredible talent as a Magus and if she was given the proper training she would been unstoppable. Fate had other plans for her and thanks to the sexism of Japan, combined with the utter cruelty of her foster father Zōken Matō (even saying his name fills me with such anger that I'm amazed I don't lash out in blind rage) she has become a shell of the spirited girl I played with when I was younger and more innocent. One could argue that she may be less than a mere shell after what Shinji was able to do while he encouraged it.

It's shameful to say that I'm glad Rider killed Shinji, but it's the honest truth. Why lie to myself that in the end his violent death at the hands of a Servant he had no real right too was something I wished; no, PRAYED for with all my heart and soul? When it's my time I guess I'll find out, but until then I'll have to live with what I wanted.

I know that there's no real victory for me thanks to the death of Archer and I should be glad Shiro won in the end. The Grail is gone forever, the city is saved and I have my sister back.

If only it were that easy. So many people have lost their lives or had them shorted by the machinations of Caster and Shinji,plus I will never see my father again nor Archer and in the end I fear Shiro learned NOTHING from all of this heartache and misery. He is damn well on his way to become Archer; a bitter and angry man betrayed by his own ideals and people. The young boy who never wanted to see crying forced to cause pain and suffering forever because he held onto a nightmare that hid itself as a dream.

When does it end? How will it end overall? With the Grail gone I fear for his safety since those who still seek the Grail's power will hunt him down for revenge and without Saber to watch over him it's up to me to act in his defense should my fears be realized.

Would I say that I love him? That in the end I'm just a Tsundere? I say that I'm a realist looking out for a sexist, blind pig who can't see the world for what it is; a harsh land that only allows the strong to thrive.

I also object to being called such a chauvinistic term like Tsundere. So I'm not some angel of mercy that waits on Shiro hand and foot? I'm a Magus dammit and I care about not only his safety but of my friends as well.

Someday he could grow up to become a man that understands his limits or he may just end up a bitter, angry man lashing out at the world he wanted to save.

Only time and Shiro himself can tell how he ends up. He is perhaps a savior or a harbinger of doom It's up to me to direct him towards a healthy role in life. Pray I succeed in doing so.


End file.
